Captured in intimate verite by filmmaker Alix Blair, the documentary Helen and the Bear is a portrait of the complex relationship between Helen and husband, former California Congressman Pete McCloskey.

A rebellious young hippie, she married prominent Republican politician twenty-six years older than her. Four decades later, as they anticipate his death, she wrestles with their marriage, her sexuality, and what’s been lost and won through a life by his side

Directed by Alix Blair, Helen and the Bear made its World Premiere at Hot Docs Festival 2024, and will next make its NY Premiere at DOC NYC Selects on Tuesday, March 25, 7pm at IFC Center.

In the ‘70s, Helen was a rebellious hippie. As a recent graduate, she needed a job and took one working for her parents’ friend, California Congressman Pete McCloskey. Handsome and charismatic, he was a rising Republican star known for challenging his party: he was a veteran and environmentalist who vehemently protested the war in Vietnam, called for Nixon’s impeachment, and co-authored the Endangered Species Act.

Helen wasn’t intimidated by Pete’s prestige and was drawn to his lack of conformity. It mirrored her own. Slowly, they grew closer. Eventually, they fell in love. When she was 25, and he 51, they married.

All of the things Pete loved about Helen—that she was adventurous and outspoken, and cursed like his Marine Corps buddies — put her at odds with being a typical politician’s wife. Despite being in love, it quickly became clear that Pete put his career first. He was a man of the people.

Helen preferred privacy. “When Pete decided to run again for Congress, I had to hide so much of myself to show up as the politician’s wife that he needed.” During their marriage, Helen had multiple long-term affairs with women. She was terrified she would hurt Pete and ruin his career. They nearly divorced. She wrote in her journal, “I am realizing how lonely everyone often is- so many kinds of loneliness, of needs unmet.” But as hard as they fought each other, they fought for their union.

In the present, Helen continues to love Pete wholeheartedly while wrestling within the confines of marriage. She finds freedom working on their farm in Rumsey, California, but the constant, solitary caretaking—of the land, the animals, and Pete—weighs on her. Whenever she can, she and Pete go on a road trip to a tiny town in New Mexico. Here, Helen has found a queer community where she feels at home. She stays out late into the night with friends, exhilarated by an unfamiliar kind of belonging.

As the story unfolds, the reality of Helen and Pete’s age difference sets in. As Pete’s health becomes more fragile, Helen wonders, “Who will I be when my life is mine alone?” When Pete has a debilitating stroke, Helen decides to sell the farm to be his full-time caregiver. Now she prepares to say goodbye to Pete, and to a love that has been messy, painful, exquisite, and true. Helen does not yet know who she will become, independent of her partner, but she knows she will find out soon.

Watch the trailer for Helen and the Bear.